Man Bites Toddler In Effort To Teach Said Toddler That Biting People Is Wrong. Really.

Hector Pulido, 40, was arrested Tuesday after day care workers discovered adult-size bite marks on the boy’s chest, stomach, shoulder, back, thigh, leg and buttocks, police said.

The boy told officers his uncle had bitten him. When questioned, Pulido allegedly admitted that he did it “to teach him not to bite anyone,” said Lt. James Viadero, a police spokesman.

Pulido was charged with assault and risk of injury to a minor. He was being held on $100,000 bond after a court appearance Wednesday. A message seeking comment was left with the public defender representing Pulido.

The toddler was evaluated at a hospital, and the state Department of Children and Families was notified.

JOKESTARTERS:

• This isn’t the first time this man has been in trouble with the law. Previously, he was arrested for kicking a toddler to teach her that kicking people was wrong, hitting a baby in an effort to teach him that hitting is wrong, and another time for killing a fetus to teach it “Thous shalt not kill.”
• Unfortunately, this incident has already been commercialized. Yes, Polident is now the proud sponsor of Hector “Bitey” Pulido’s new Dangerous Daycare Center.
• In a related story, a Las Vegas man was arrested after trying to convince young boys that “Oral sex is good. And I mean really really really good” We can’t go into any further details here though…

SOURCE:

• WRAL